A Conundrum of Cutting the Cord…

snoopy_happy_dance_2

Nirvana for wireless network providers has to be when subscribers start using their network for all their communication needs.

I have many friends who exist, sans a land line, with only a cell phone.  And I think that’s just fine until you have to troubleshoot a problem with said cell phone–particulary a smartphone.

Let’s use AT&T Wireless for an example (currently, my favorite whipping company)…

They MUST do snoopy dances every time a subscriber picks them over a landline.  It probably goes something like this…

AT&T Wireless:  CUT THE CORD!  CUT THE CORD! CUT THE CORD!

New Subscriber:  ”Hi. I want to sign-up with you, AT&T Wireless, for all my communication needs.

ATT:  Snoopy Dance! Snoopy Dance! Snoopy Dance!

NS:  I want to get the new iPhone 3GS, too!

ATT:   Snoopy Dance! Snoopy Dance! Snoopy Dance!

NS:  Great! Now, instead of a land line and telephone,  I have a new iPhone 3GS and AT&T Wireless for all my communication needs.  Thank you Apple! Thank you AT&T!

ATT (and Apple):  Snoopy Dance! Snoopy Dance! Snoopy Dance!

Later…

NS:  Hi, I’m having a problem with my new iPhone 3GS.  Visual Voicemail is not working and I have a lot of dropped calls.

ATT:  No problem, we’ll help you out.  Can you call us from another line?

NS:  (silence… then)  Um, I don’t have another line.  I use AT&T for all my communication needs.

ATT:  (silent laughter)  I’m sorry, sir/maam, but we can’t help until you call us back from another line.

NS:  But I only have my new iPhone 3GS and AT&T for all my communication needs. I don’t have anything else.  You told me I wouldn’t need anything else.

ATT:  Can you call from a family member’s phone, or a friend’s?

NS:  I don’t have any friends, and all my famly is dead.

ATT:  Neighbor?

NS:  None.

ATT:  I’m sorry, but we can’t help until you call us back from another line.

NS:  Um.

ATT:  Is there anything else we can help you with, today?  Have I addressed all your questions?

NS:  Um.

ATT:  Have a nice day.

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